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Never the Same: Coming to Terms with the Death of a Parent, by Donna Schuurman
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Children and teens who experience the death of a parent are never the same. Only in the last decade have counselors acknowledged that children grieve too, and that unresolved issues can negatively impact children into adulthood. Unaddressed grief can lead to depression, substance abuse, and relationship difficulties. For at least three generations of adults, these issues have been largely ignored. Having worked with thousands of families as Executive Director of the Dougy Center for Grieving Children, Donna Schuurman understands the dangers of unresolved grief better than anyone else. In Never the Same, Schuurman offers expert advice and encouragement to empower readers to reflect on their unique situation, come to terms with the influence of their parent's death, and live more healthful, peaceful lives.
The only book of its kind, Never the Same is an essential companion for those still struggling with the early loss of a parent.
- Sales Rank: #356249 in Books
- Published on: 2004-07-01
- Released on: 2004-07-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .58" w x 5.50" l, .75 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 256 pages
Amazon.com Review
Time does not heal all wounds, warns grief counselor Donna Schuurman in her brave and practical book about the challenges adults face in coming to terms with the loss of a parent before age 18. Her premise in Never the Same defies the common wisdom. "Forget the stages of grief. There is no magical moment when you can say, it’s over." Using thoughtful self-assessments and examples, Schuurman persuades readers that grief must be reprocessed at every stage of life. First, she invites readers to look backward, examining their reactions and coping strategies at the time of their parent’s death. Moving into the present, she asks, what meaning do your make of your parent’s death as an adult? Schuurman details the high cost of unresolved grieving, including depression, anxiety, pessimism, underachievement, and troubled relationships. She then outlines suggestions for dealing with the legacy of a parent’s death and choosing healthy traditions for remembering. Adults and parents will find this a wise and compassionate book—-an indispensable guide to the unfinished business of losing a parent at an early age. --Barbara Mackoff
Review
“A remarkably jargon-free book that is filled with practical advice and worksheets.” ―Seattle Post-Intelligencer
About the Author
Donna Schuurman speaks regularly in national venues in her role as Executive Director of The Dougy Center for Grieving Children (Portland, OR), the first peer grief support program in the world for children, teens, and families. She has directed The Dougy Center for seven years, and serves on the Board of Directors of the Association for Death Education and Counseling, the largest professional association of educators, counselors, and thanatologists in the country. She received her doctorate in counseling from Northern Illinois University in 1990, and has a masters in communication from Wheaton Graduate School.
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
one of the best books written about grieving children for grieving children by ...
By Stefanie Norris
Undoubtedly, one of the best books written about grieving children for grieving children by a true expert.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Five Stars
By Elaine Catherine
Good book
17 of 18 people found the following review helpful.
Just never got to anything useful!
By Just some lady on the internet...
This book sounded like a good one...I loved the title and hoped for more than I found inside. The author keeps teasing, "If you went through the death of your parent, read on for practical help!" Chapter after chapter is filled with this entreaty. It gets annoying to read this plea in every chapter! Finally, the very last chapter in the book consists of 10 suggestions for moving on from the death of a parent. They are very simplistic and not worth reading the entire book to get.
I lost my mother when I was 10, and it is something I will never truly recover from. It has shaped my life from that time forward, and made me who I am. I read a lot of books about people who lose a parent in their childhood, just to see what other people have gone through. My dad was not a very interactive parent either, so I consider myself an orphan in some ways. I think there are better books about healing from the loss of a parent.
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